I am a black hole. I am the better half of a lichen. I am the universe. I am special. I am the High-Priestess of Zolac, the God of Dead Ecotourists, God-King of Hostilistan, and Keeper of the Sacred Words: Je Suis Canadien, Copious Amounts of Gu, and Uncoverable Oozing Lesions. I am Jack's Incessant Sarcasm. I am a space heater, and a garbage disposal. I am bigger on the inside. I am... just so easily... lost my stuff. I am perfect. I am always serious, and I am never serious. This soup is who I am.
My life is a fanfic. I write fanfic about my life.
...But don't take my word for it. You can trust these celebrity testimonials!